Alignment
by x.lithium
Summary: There are thirteen origami frogs in the bottom compartment of her drawer.


_I will be the best damn constellation that is in your sky tonight; (Cops and Robbers, A Rocket to the Moon)  
_**ALIGNMENT**

There are thirteen origami frogs in the bottom compartment of her bedroom drawer.

Frog number one is the first time he says sorry to her. She is sarcastic and unyielding (because really it isn't enough, not when he's apologizing for all the shit he's put her through, and all the shit he inevitably _will _put her through) and still just a tiny bit touched. He'll never realize the significance of the moment (for all his talent, it is the behaviours and mannerisms of _others _that he analyses, not those that are his), but this is the first time he apologizes and truly means it.

Frog number two is the time her strength threatens to break, because she doesn't know (and this scares her more than anything). When he hypnotizes her, he holds her for far longer than necessary: eight minutes and twenty seven seconds, (but he isn't counting).

She is nervous and skittish, and can't stop trembling as she goes up to change into what Jane has deemed 'appropriate homeclothes' for the charade, and the paper frog is lying just under the doorframe of her room. He is childish and a pain and a complete jackass sometimes (but sweet and reassuring, too).

Frogs three and four come as Jane moves in and out of her apartment. She should know something is up when she arrives home to find a paper frog sitting on the couch of her living room, but thinks nothing of it because with the all secret meanings and intentions that he hides within his actions, there are also times when he is absolutely, uncomprehendingly random. When he shows up during her favourite nighttime drama, accompanied by three boxes and a suitcase of his belongings, a grin, and a comment that her apartment is much too large for just one person, she simply stands aside and hopes he doesn't notice that she is clutching his frog in her hand.

She has been seeing Aiden for three weeks when Jane offers to move out. She tells him he can stay (after all, Aiden is moving into her bedroom and the guest room has, in her mind, already become Jane's room), but he waves away her notions and as he teases her goodbye until the morning, Aiden arrives with boxes and a suitcase of his own stuff. As Aiden plops onto her bed later that evening, the paper frog jumps out from the mess of her blankets. Aiden laughs good-naturedly and jokes that he won't share her bed with anything, even an origami creation of hers. (She doesn't tell him who really makes them and the next morning, she adds a discreet lock to the bottom compartment of her drawer.

She finds frog number five on the grave of her father. It is the anniversary of his death and she recognizes it immediately when she arrives at the cold white marble grave. As she lays the flowers down, she looks around. He is watching her from somewhere hidden, she knows. (This is their game of hide-and-seek, whether they are hiding from themselves or one another, she doesn't know.)

Frog number six is tangled and braided into the mane of the pony he bought her for her birthday. She doesn't question how he knows she will visit the pony after work that day, and she doesn't quite know what the frog means. (He doesn't really either, all he knows is the little spurt of happiness in his chest at her quiet joy.)

She doesn't like number seven, because she finds it in her coat pocket six hours after he screams and storms at her. The next morning he is lying on his couch smiling at her and her team, and she feels strangely alone and he is oddly untouchable. (But she won't let him throw his life away, not for a lead that might not even give them Red John, not for _anything_.)

Frog number eight is her break-up with Aiden. He looks at her solemnly as they stand face to face a meter apart in the CBI elevator, flicks one of his blonde curls back into place, then hands her the origami frog. It helps, because no, she didn`t love Aiden, but he was something steady in her life and he was easy to love. Number eight is also the day he moves back into her guest bedroom.

Frog number nine is bloodstained. She is holding the frog and listening to the messages on her phone when his voice comes through, telling her that Red John has contacted him, and he is going to meet his family`s killer. As she jerks in panic, her hand is cut on the sharp metal fringe of the door they are renovating in her apartment.

Frog number ten comes only a day later. She is waiting anxiously in the CBI for news because it is out of her hands, when Jane and Cho walk into the bullpen. Jane is the owner of seven light knife wounds and Cho has gained a few bruises, but they are both otherwise unharmed and Red John is in handcuffs. She is too relieved even to scream, and collapses on Jane as he helps her back to her car. The frog sits silently on her bedside table when she wakes up in the morning.

Frog number eleven is the first time she sleeps with Jane, in the most innocent sense of the word. She is lying in her bed after Red John's trial when he walks into her room and curls himself into her side. When she wakes up in the morning, he is holding her hand with the paper frog between their palms; there is no awkwardness because Red John is gone and they both need a little bit of comfort.

Number twelve is the first time she sleeps with Jane, in the not so innocent way. She doesn't quite know what triggers it. He is folding the frog as they head to the kitchen to grab something to eat when Jane pushes her against the wall with the entire length of his body, presses his hips between her legs, holds the back of her knees and lifts her straight off the floor with the strength she didn't know he possessed. The frog lies beside her head on the pillow as he drives her crazy and holds her down with the full weight of his body.

Frog number twelve is also the first time he kisses her and the first time she hears the incredible low growl of his voice against her ear, the first time she fully feels the rumble of his chest against her when he laughs and the first time she clings onto his golden curls (and the first time he tells her he loves her).

Number thirteen is lying quietly on her desk when she walks into her office and she knows it is different as soon as she picks it up. It is slightly heavier than usual and the head of a diamond glistens from between the folds of the origami creature.

She doesn't run to him or cry or is speechless, because this is who they are. Her first instinct is to laugh because the whole proposal is so incredibly _Jane_.

The first time she folds an origami frog is after frog number thirteen; it is pudgier and less sharp than his frogs, and one of its legs is decidedly crippled-looking, but she leaves it lying on his chest (because for once, he really _is _sleeping) with a _Yes _scrawled on its head.

There are thirteen origami frogs in the bottom compartment of her bedroom door, there is one that he always keeps in the pockets of his trousers.

* * *

Not sure how I feel about this piece, it's not very sparkly to me.


End file.
